Yesterday we had a Dr apt. which was completely routine...got weighed (hate that part), measured, and heard the Sari's heart beat...then we talked and decided with all that's been going on to do a test to see when she is likely to come. If the test comes back Neg. then we have a 99% chance that she won't come for two weeks...if it is Pos. then its a sign that it could be anytime in the near future. Nash was predicting a Neg. result, I figured it would be Pos. because I didn't want to get my hopes up and then be crushed. And I was right to do so...it has come back and is Pos. So now I'm on my meds ever 4 hours weither I think I need them or not (so I feel crappy) and I'm resting as much as possible.
I realize that with some of you I've been a little short/annoied about answering questions. I'm sorry, part of it is being in a stressful pregnancy and dealing with hormones (yes I will use that excuse) and part of it is I don't like being put on the spot and having to decide quickly about what I will and won't tell. So I've decided that I need to write down some of your questions and answer them in writing...I've always been better at writing than speaking. So I'll answer questions that I can think of, in no particular order, and if you do have more please send a email or comment on the blog and I'll answer it in my own time ;)
What does the Dr. say about all this?
Well she can't say much (because I'm just as educated in my care as she is), she is worried and is taking good care of us. But until the emergency happens she is just holding her breath like the rest of us.
How am I doing?
Depends on the day, somedays are better than others and somedays are just bad. I am starting to go stir crazy but it helps to know that 1 day in me is about 3 days less in the NICU.
Do I have a "time" (day or week) that I think she'll come?
No I don't. I can't think like that, I wake up each day and think well today will be a good day for a birthday and I think the same thing when I go to sleep. Nash on the other hand is still hopeful we will make it to 32 weeks.
Is this our last baby? am I going to get my tubes tied?
Yes this is our last, much to Emory's disappointment (he wants us to provide him with a brother) and when we told him this last week he started crying. Yes, we plan on having my tubes tied, if the uterus is still residing in me. There is a high likely hood due to our history and having another placenta previa that a hysterectomy will be preformed after she is delivered.
Will I be okay with a hysterectomy?
Yes, due to my endometriosis we've kinda figured that eventually it would be in our future anyways. So having one at the same time as a C-section will just cut out another surgery. If this ends up being the case they will leave in the ovaries so I won't need hormones. Though if I need the hyst. then I will most likely be bleeding and need a blood transfusion or two....
How are the kids doing?
They are fine, we're still doing school, though its pretty basic. They like being home but do miss gymnastics. They wish mommy could do more with them, but understand that mommy needs to rest. And they don't mind getting to watch extra movies!!!!
How is Nash?
From my point of view he is doing okay, staying positive to counter balance my realism. Though I know he is worried because while he is sleeping he pulls me close and holds on for dear life.... He is enjoying his break from school and is not really looking forward to school starting on Monday. He will be taking 17 credits, working, and dealing with all our drama. I worry about him but we've done this before and we always find a way to work through it.
What kind of help do we need right now?
I need to stay calm as much as possible, so if you need to freak about about anything we've told you please don't do it with me. I pick up on emotions way too much and then I start freaking myself out even more than I already do. I am able to handle a email or comment on the blog much better than say a phone call....I know I'm weird, but at least I've realized this and it has helped keep me sane this time. We are still managing things here at home, it helps that Nash is off from school...
When "things" happen will you try and hold off delivery?
Truthfully I can't answer this question, because it all depends on how, and what happens. We won't have to put off delivery to get the steriod shots (like we did with Emory) because I got them before Christmas. And if we start bleeding it just depends on how bad it is, if Sari is showing distress or I'm having more contractions.... There are sooooooooo many cenarios that I have created in my head that could happen that well we just have to wait and see what does really happen.
What help do we want after the delivery?
I hope after reading this that Ymana and my parents will have bags packed and be ready to come up here when we call :) Again I can't really say more than this because we don't know what will happen, there is a chance that it could be like Rae and we'll have some extra time... I'm not really counting on that since we've been fighting off contractions for months. When the time comes we will evaluate what we need and for how long. I'm sorry I can't be more specific, that has been on thing that has been hard....everyone wants specifics and I just can't provide them.
How are we spelling her name?
Sari, its the only spelling that I like :)
Well I think I've answered the most typical questions I've been getting. I hope I haven't overwhelmed any of you or created more worry. I hope if anything you feel more included and will be more willing to forgive my short answers at times. I'm dealing with alot and trying my best. I hope everyone will have a great day and know we LOVE all of you and are so THANKFUL for your support and encouragement.
Heather, Nash, Anya, Emory, RaeLee and Baby Sari